Friday, November 17, 2006

7dp3dt-Grumble, Grumble, Bitch and Moan

Okay, this waiting shit is getting SERIOUSLY old. Quickly. I'm a bit testy today, can you tell? Probably because I have yet another headache, courtesy of.......who the hell knows. Most of my "symptoms" have been more than likely progesterone-related: bloated, moody, sleepy, hungry, sore and itchy boobs, cramping/pulling feelings. However, there is a plus side-my hair and skin look fierce-hopefully that will be a precursor if this ever works. But, the headaches are a new thing, that I haven't had before. I had a headache for two days straight in the beginning of the week, then I came home, took a nap for about an hour and then, when I woke up, had a killer headache. I took a Tylenol (which is the only thing I can take-it's about akin to dousing a fire by peeing on it), and it's dulled the pain, but didn't completely remove it. Grrr.....

No, I haven't tested yet. I am going to try to hold off until Sunday-it'll be two days before beta day, so more than likely it'll be more accurate. The jury is still out as to whether it'll be positive or not. I am not holding out much hope-I don't know why I say that, but usually my gut feelings turn out to be correct. Then it'll be back to the drawing board, I guess.

I found out today that yet another teacher at school is pregnant. They just keep dropping like flies, it seems. I wish to God that it were me. I wish that every single day. I've done everything I could, pray, visit shrines, done acupuncture, ate lots of protein, ate pineapple, drank raspberry tea, eliminated caffiene, bargained, begged..........and nothing. I'm about to hop a plane to see Watson and get her mom's healer on the case. And, from what Watson has written, I'd have to be incurably insane to even contemplate that. But, I'm contemplating it.

I'm just getting tired of the whole rollercoaster. I'm too afraid to jump off just yet, but how long can I take this stress and anxiety? How long until I have a breakdown?

I just want a baby. I really don't think that it's too much to ask, do you?

4 comments:

Jessica said...

It's not too much to ask, and I hope & pray that you are the next one at your school to be a teacher who is pg. The damn wait sucks and it's no fun. Hang in there, we'll all be lurking...

Nickie said...

I'll be back early Sun morning to see if you tested and the result. I have a good feeling for you, I hope it's well founded. Hang in there, this wait is almost over.

cat said...

Sunday it is then. Still holding your hands *both of them now*

It's not to much to ask at all. It never was, it never will be.

Love you, thinking of you.

MelnHead said...

not too much to ask at all... Teachers at my school are dropping like flies too... and since I'm in a new school/town/state this year no one knows about me- and I'm trying hard to just find reasons to walk away. Hoping that tomorrow brings happy news...